Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
