My brain says no but my pants say off.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
