jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
