No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
