Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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