if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
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Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
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Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
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