When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
