In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
