why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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