He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just pynch a tree in the face
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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