Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize