you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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