I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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