Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
