well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
