i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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