ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
