stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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