just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I just found puke in my bra..
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
