It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize