glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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