I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
