Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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