just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
