Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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