the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I think im going to throw up on grandma
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Randomize
