You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
