Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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