i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
PS: I just woke up from my shower
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
