I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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