all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
