so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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