dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize