Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I deserve this hangover.
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