that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
We are two peas in an std pod
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
