That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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