in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize