I bet he comes in French.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
