Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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