he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My dick has a subreddit
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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