Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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