I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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