Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Randomize
