I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
