Define "chronic" masturbator.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator