Texts From Last Night

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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.

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  (816): I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins. http://tfl.nu/76g5
  Replies (8) Good night (2986) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.

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  (732): some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america. http://tfl.nu/u0og
  Replies (33) Good night (741) Bad night (4956)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.

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  (520): Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents. http://tfl.nu/dtw6
  Replies (5) Good night (4340) Bad night (1231)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.

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  (618): Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it. http://tfl.nu/arfl
  Replies (73) Good night (4920) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.

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  (718): At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down. http://tfl.nu/ki6l
  Replies (18) Good night (7607) Bad night (1156)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee

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  (231): We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee http://tfl.nu/m4t7
  Replies (33) Good night (1444) Bad night (4232)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.

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  (509): You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters. http://tfl.nu/qaew
  Replies (6) Good night (2717) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.

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  (+61): She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level. http://tfl.nu/h0jn
  Replies (15) Good night (5930) Bad night (990)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I think I have vodka in my lungs

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  (206): I think I have vodka in my lungs http://tfl.nu/shpx
  Replies (4) Good night (1943) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.

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  (510): Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it. http://tfl.nu/z26i
  Replies (4) Good night (2289) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover

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  (734): I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover http://tfl.nu/93w3
  Replies (1) Good night (1199) Bad night (487)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home

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  (775): You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home http://tfl.nu/dzie
  Replies (4) Good night (833) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.

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  (602): After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her. http://tfl.nu/mkbl
  Replies (5) Good night (951) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.

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  (216): I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote. http://tfl.nu/863q
  Replies (6) Good night (746) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.

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  (408): I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment. http://tfl.nu/nl3d
  Replies (2) Good night (548) Bad night (272)

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