That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
