Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
