Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
