dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
