Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
