i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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